Eleven Ways to Get Rid Of Pharmaceutical Reps

As received in an Email, a little help for doctors and pharmacists.

Eleven Ways to Get Rid Of Pharmaceutical Reps

1. Develop a chemical sensitivity to pizza and doughnuts
2. Ask them if they give the product to their kid.
3. Establish a strict office dress code. Tell your office manager not to admit anyone wearing tailored skirt suits or highly polished shoes. ( As an added bonus this will limit the number of lawyers who seek your services.)
4. If they are hawking antidepressants, tell them you only treat children, and ask them to send you full color brochures about their “black box.”
5. Be sure to return all of your phone calls while the rep is waiting to see you.
6. Hire a pharmacology graduate student to help out in your front office. The drug rep may not see you, until the student has finished quizzing him on the chemical properties of all of his products.
7. Schedule four of them at the same time and only see the one who emerges from your waiting room alive.
8. Ask them whether their company has underwritten psychologists' efforts to get prescribing privileges.
9. If the drug rep is hawking stimulants, them him or her back to your office and confidentially tell him that you have had a bit of a problem with your DEA license. Could they provide you with lots of free samples?
10. Post the AMA ethics guidelines about dealing with pharmaceutical companies in your waiting room and ask your office manager to review the guidelines monthly.
11. Get your information about psychopharmacology from talking to colleagues, attending seminars, and reading journals.