Dr. Feel Good

A poem found on the Advocate Web website. AdvocateWeb is a nonprofit organization providing information and resources to promote awareness and understanding of the issues involved in the exploitation of persons by trusted helping professionals. They are attempting to be a helpful resource for victim/survivors, their family and friends, the general public, and for victim advocates and professionals.

Dr. Feel Good
Toni

His guise was to heal,
But that was not the deal.
I put my well being into his hands,
and naively followed his commands.

I did not see he was there to seduce;
Feelings of shameful stupidity it would produce.
He caught me in a weakened state,
at his will would lie my fate.

Self respect is not all he would take.
I could not find it in my of him to forsake.
My awful secret I would conceal.
Who would believe me if I were to reveal?

Like a thief he took my dignity,
along with my trusting ability,
taking full advantage of my vulnerability.
He took it all the while
he kept a cunning smile.

What he took can not be replaced.
From my memory it can never be erased.
I could find no hiding place.
To his “charm” I fell victim.
My welfare did not matter to him.

His intentions I refused to believe.
The damage he could inflict I could not conceive.
By this ugly truth I am consumed.
And he? He remains immune.

But why me did he pick.
This man who supposed to heal the sick?
Was it the color of my hair?
Or was I just... THERE?

Drugs is what he would supply
in order to get me to comply.
Give in I would not do.
So I became a waste of time in his view,
but he was in too deep.
Of all of this he did not want me to make a peep.
Enough drugs and maybe she'll never wake from sleep.

Ethics is only part of what he lacks.
He provided a monkey for my back.
Like a child to a father, I trusted him.
That trust soon began to dim.

What he did is equivalent to child abuse,
it was the child in me he did use.
One day I may get bold
and of this story I will have told.

No one could get him to admit
to the moral crimes he did commit.
It is him and public opinion I fear.
I would be viewed as the guilty and my name left to clear.

He'd come out smelling like a rose all along
knowing it is he who is in the wrong.
I could testify,
and him try to defy.

But can he really be caught?
And unbiased justice truly be sought?
If so, could there be a happy ever after
come the end of this chapter?