Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Pooflinger’s Syndrome

As seen here on SlashNot

The National Asperger’s Institute has released clinical diagnostic criteria for nuerotypical (normal) humans, placing the list of symptoms under the umbrella spectrum disorder “Pooflinger’s Syndrome.” Dr. Sarl Cagan explains the reason and meaning of the diagnosis.

“Recent research suggests that neurotypical individuals are, in fact, capable of relatively high functioning language abilities. This discovery, along with the fact that they exhibit at least some facility with computers, indicates that a clinical diagnosis can be helpful in getting these individuals the help that they so desperately need.”

Symptoms of Pooflinger’s Syndrome include:

* Sensitivity to nonverbal social cues such as facial expressions and body language
* Self-subordination into primate hierarchical groups.
* Late or incompletely developed mathematical development.
* Inability to develop even the simplest lexical parser.
* Inability to comprehend the preceding symptom.
* Inability to create satire.

“A clinical diagnosis of Pooflinger’s Syndrome can open up federal assistance grants to get these people the help they need, before it’s too late.”
Yes, another fictional psychiatric disease, presented tongue in cheek

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